People suffer many types of loss throughout their lives. With loss, comes grief.
In 2008, Dominic Murgido saw need in the area and began to host a support group for those who have experienced a sudden unexpected death of a spouse. Since then the sudSSpirit Bereavement Support Group holds a meeting once a month at the Exeter Community Library.
Murgido, a resident of Lebanon County, founded the group following the sudden loss of his wife. He says it is still something he struggles with. “And we find that, you know, grief stays with us throughout our lives, especially depending on the connection you have with the loved one. You just learn how to manage it and you learn how to grow from it. You become better; a new person you now are due to it.”
To cope, he sought out support groups and attended one for six weeks until it ended.
“I just felt like I needed more than that.”
After another search, Murgido found another general bereavement support group; general in the sense that the people in attendance have experienced loss in a variety of ways. It was monthly, and not nearby, but he made the trip because it was something he knew he needed.
“What was happening with me is some of the people in my group also lost a spouse.”
He explained how after the meeting, the group members would walk to their cars start talking about how they related to what each other had shared and there was a sense of validation.
“And then I realized, wow – wouldn’t it be something to get a bunch of people together and go to a group that’s just for the sudden expected loss of a spouse; for the spouse survivors. So I started looking for that, thinking there has to be one out there. And there was not. So I started one.”
The purpose of the group is to help each other to heal and move forward.
“I kind of started it in a way, selfishly, because I needed more of those people around me to help share the loss my loss and then vice versa they’ll share their loss with me and I will help them.”
The group grew from that small group to what it is now. In addition to the meeting held in Berks county, which was the first one, there are two other active chapters: one in Cumberland County and one up in Vermont since he lived in there for three years. For those unable to attend the meetings, sudSSpirit Bereavement puts out a quarterly newsletter.
“I’d love to expand it, but you have to realize that the facilitator of these groups is somebody that is also like the people that are coming,” said Murgido, explaining how they’re not professionals. “They’re a regular person who lost a spouse or a significant other.”
He describes the group as very low key and casual; it’s an open forum with no set agenda. People can come and go as they please; there is no registration and is no charge.
“Part of the uniqueness of the SuddSpirist is that we’re not counselors, we’re not therapists, we’re not trained people – we just lived through it.”
Murgido says the group will never reach an end point. “My whole thing for developing this was that it will never end. Because I saw that when it ends, sometimes people need more. “
For more information, contact sudsspirit@gmail.com or find the group on Facebook. sudSSpirit Bereavement Support Group will hold its monthly meeting on Wednesday, Jan. 25, at 6 p.m. at the Exeter Community Library.
