The other day I was driving along in my car, minding my own business when out of the corner of my eye I caught a subtle flash of movement on the console. Being alone in the car, there should not be anything moving anywhere that is not attached to me, so naturally this motion alerted my curiosity.
I glanced in that general direction and much to my horror I saw that I actually had a travelling companion – a stinkbug was hitching a ride with me. Oh joy. I am not completely phobic about bugs, although I have had some pretty unpleasant run-ins with these guys so I have a healthy sense of “respect” for these little critters. Anyway, I found it a bit disconcerting to be travelling with a stinkbug in my vehicle, so as I drove I debated what the best plan was to dispose of this uninvited guest.
I had to toss him out the window at the first opportunity, but to do this I knew I would have to touch him. That is a rather unpleasant proposition because I know that as soon as you touch these little fellows you are marked with their scent. And it is difficult to remove. I don’t know about you, but the classic stinkbug aroma reminds me of the smell of my mom’s old Electrolux canister vacuum cleaner, and that is not a scent I want attached to my hands for the rest of the day.
So maybe I should find a tissue and grab it with that as a scent barrier. That is a good plan. But I’m still driving so I have to wait till I get to a stop sign or red light to put the plan into action. After feeling fairly confident that my strategy will work, I glance down just to check on his whereabouts and to my horror I discover that he is gone. Vanished into thin air. He could be anywhere inside the vehicle and I am suddenly feeling like I’m in a scene from a bad “B” movie, being stalked by some monster in the foggy twilight with creepy music playing in the background.
What to do? What to do? I pretty much wanted to pull over and start tearing the car apart looking for the little bugger. In my mind I could feel him lurking on the headrest, waiting to jump into my hair and causing me to careen out of control into oncoming traffic, becoming the next headline in the paper….get a grip woman! It’s just a bug! Deep breaths, easy does it. That’s better. Bring the blood pressure back down to normal….
I continued on my way, still in the company of my hidden guest, uncertain when he might strike but unable to rid my vehicle of his menacing presence until I stopped. As I rode along I began to reflect that in some ways, we all drive with stinkbugs in our lives. Stinkbugs of anger, addiction, prejudice, rejection at times make their presence known and threaten to derail our journey and destroy our peace of mind.
These stinkbugs sometimes go into hiding and remain unseen until something triggers them and they attack from out of nowhere, but the awareness that they are lurking in the darkness is never far from the back of our minds. What to do? What to do? Take my advice – as soon as you catch a glimpse of one of those suckers, don’t wait – toss them clean out and don’t give them any opportunity to return because take it from me: living with stinkbugs makes for a very long and stressful commute!
